In Writing

News just broke that Huma Abedin is finally dropping Anthony Weiner like the horny little hot potato that he is. Damn, that took so much longer than it should have. But, yes, she is finally choosing self respect and leaving the man who quite literally can’t keep it in his pants.

I recently watched the well-done documentary, Weiner, that chronicled his mayoral bid just at the time that a second sexting scandal was hitting the news. Huma, a high-powered, well-educated, intelligent woman is seen enduring yet more humiliation as the story becomes public. It is cringe-worthy to see her try to support him as it becomes apparent for all to see that he has dogged her yet again. It’s a fascinating glimpse into hubris and political calculations. (Side note: I highly recommend the documentary, which won a prize at the Sundance Film Festival and has a 96% “fresh” rating on Rotten Tomatoes).

What’s kind of sad is that he’s a pretty likable guy. He’s self-aware and self-deprecating about his troubles, and he’s got an astute political mind. But he just can’t seem to get out of his own way. The real story for me has always been Huma, though. As right-hand woman to one of the most powerful and successful women in the world, what in Zeus’ name was she doing sticking through so much public humiliation? Of course we all mean “til death do us part” when we say it, but when the other party breaks the promise so spectacularly, I say we get to reconsider our commitment, too. It’s not a vow of martyrdom. And it’s not like she’s some financially-strapped, middle-aged woman who has to put up with being humiliated because she’s afraid she can’t do better or can’t financially make it on her own – she’s young and beautiful and quite capable of standing on her own two feet. (I do feel genuinely sorry for women who fall into the former category, but she’s not that). I am so glad to see she’s finally decided to face her fears and send him packing.

Anyway, today the news broke, and I just wanted to acknowledge it. It’s hard to know what goes on privately or why she held on as long as she did. Probably some version of thinking that if she just held on long enough he’d give her the respect she deserves, that maybe he’d change (news flash: nope. Love and respect don’t simply “re-materialize” once they’re gone, and no amount of waiting and hoping will change that fact). Today’s decision has been a long time coming, no doubt. Good for her. May it embolden women everywhere to choose self-respect over fear and keeping the status quo at all cost.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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