I have long had a love affair with all things British. I got up in the wee hours to watch Princess Diana’s wedding and, decades later, her son’s. I’ve read their histories and marveled at their grand castles. I’ve loved them down to enjoying my rides on their perfect subways. I’ve gobbled up every episode of Downton Abbey. All that refinement. All that pomp. All that civility.
So I won’t get into discussing the dopey mess they’ve just made of their lives with this dumb Brexit vote, out of respect for the many decades of enjoyment they’ve provided me. I’ll just say that reading about it has added new, if slightly darker, enjoyment to my life. Most notably, I’ve really had fun reading the insults they can lob. Here are a few:
I don’t want to be rude but, really, you have the charisma of a damp rag and the appearance of a low-grade bank clerk.”
(The quote above is attributable to Nigel Farange, who was pro-Brexit, but although I disagree with his politics, you’ve got to hand it to homeboy for coming up with a sick burn. Bonus points: he was fined $4,000 for saying this).
But perhaps the best ones I read were those hurled via Twitter in response to Donald Trump’s tone deaf and factually incorrect tweet saying Scotland was “wild” after the Brexit vote. Ummm… no. Scotland voted overwhelmingly in favor of staying in. Scots told him so, quite colorfully.
Uh @realDonaldTrump Scotland was more yellow than your fake tan pic.twitter.com/BTP24txUjq
— Sammy (@SammyAlbon) June 24, 2016
Scotland voted to stay & plan on a second referendum, you tiny fingered, Cheeto-faced, ferret wearing shitgibbon. https://t.co/iKyEIxf8ej
— Hamfisted Bun Vendor 🔞 (@MetalOllie) June 24, 2016
Scotland voted to stay you numpty.
— Connor (@Scarfulhu) June 24, 2016